2012 is probably my life turning year.
- Facing up to the truth that the person I married is not who I thought he is.
- Knowing what and where went wrong and taking responsibility for it.
- Finally found the guts to accept that there were too many lies and cheating in the marriage and I have to move on if I want a better life for myself and Jay.
- Going through a very painful albeit a very much needed divorce.
- Having the courage to tell everyone now that I am seperated and am now a single mum.
- Having my son in and out of the hospital for a whole week and taking care of him all by myself 95% of the time.
- Gone through terrible depression and losing 10kgs in two weeks.
- Trust in God and the power he has.
- Accepting the fact that God will not give me everything I asked for. But he will give me strength to face everything I need to face.
- Going to church and bringing the little one with me.
- Accepting God into my life on Christmas Day
- Making my son learn what I've learned - the Piano. (Super happy about this)
- Be decisive and stick to my decision.
- And most importantly, after all the shit, I want to be a better person for Jay.
At times, I look back and wonder how and why everything happened the way it did. Sometimes, I understand and sometimes I don't.
I'm not sure how everything will turn out from now as being a single mum is really tough. Things that could be managed by two people needs to shouldered by one now.
Scared? I am sometimes. I just tell myself that I have to bite the bullet and strut on. Cos' that's life. The sun didn't and will not stop shining for anyone.
And as a friend puts it : When Life gives you lemons, you make lemonades out of them. Then find a friend whose Life has given them vodka and have a party!
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